Michael said it best....

I am not alone.

I don't know why I am on the verge of tears right now. I get so sick of feeling like I can't control how I feel and react right now. I know that how I am feeling is only a result of my hormones trying to balance itself out, but its got me extremely sensitive. I feel like I should just cut communication until it's all done in order to avoid saying or doing anything else that may leave me regretting my reactions. These mood swings are so tricky. Every time I feel like I am on back to normal , I start to feel like I'm losing it again. I need a hug. I am so like Deborah in that episode of Everybody Loves Raymond when he was afraid to go near her because it was her "lady's days" and she kept flipping out and then crying and then laughing and repeat.She asks him why doesn't he just hug her when she's like this and he's all backed in a corner where she has him like her prey and he shouts "This is not hug- able!" It really isn't. I say damn that Eve for eating the apple. Adam too. Had he not been so damn fast... maybe the hoopla is true and we wouldn't have been cursed with this period of madness ( no pun intended), I do love that it arrives like clockwork since I remember how weird it was when it was erratic, but now why do I feel so bad for not being able to control my emotions. Sometimes I feel like I don't know what is wrong with me but I do. I try not to say much but I've fucked up. I'm feeling like I need a muzzle on my mouth. Fuck it. I'm going into obscurity until I no longer feel like I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. Times like now I need a cloak over my head and to only look down. No eye contact and exchange no words or risk sounding like a woman who's lost it. Repeat. I take comfort in knowing that I'm not alone but if it gets worse as they say, I may need to take something. That woman with the husband who understand her cycle is a lucky one. I only hope I will have that kind of support. Oh God , I'm going to cry again! I'm a friggin mess! I'm off... I'll be back when I don't feel the need to cry at a random commercial or for some reason that makes absolutely no sense.

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